Posted in Craft of writing, Creative Nonfiction Narrative, Details in Writing, Fiction & Nonfiction Writing, How to Write Emotional Beats, Metaphors, Reflection, Writing exercises

3 Enhancing Elements for your Stories and Essays

Metaphor of Women’s Dress Styles to our Writing 

Let’s explore that metaphor of women’s wedding attire to our writing. It struck me as useeful as I ruminated on women’s style of clothing today after attenting a wedding. 

A lot of stylish women showed off their figures in form-fitting dresses, both short and long at a family wedding recently in Phoenix. Regardless how one fit into herdress, in my humble opinion, some were too skinny for the style they wore and some were out of proportion (top heavy or bottom heavy) to select the style they had on.

Many wore a long dress, tucked in around their heels that made them scoot, shuffle, or skate across the floor, therefore, losing their natural walking gait. 

Let’s apply the form-fitting dress to our writing, whether it is travel writing or any other genre.

Too Skinny

Some women were too skinny and didn’t give shape or meaning to wearing a stylish dress. We can write skinny with not enough meat on the bones — too tight, too lean, too emotionless or meaningless.

  1. We need to flesh out our stories or essays by using our senses to illustrate what’s happening, where in the world we are, and how the action is taking place. Sensory details add depth and fullness to our stories.
  2. We can add emotional reaction to the events of the narrative or essay. We can alson reflect to what’s going on. How does it impact the key character(s)?
  3. We can also give heft, shape, and meaning by using an appropriate metaphor that runs the gamut of the story or one that gives weight to a single event. 

Too Out of Proportion – Top-heavy or bottom-heavy

We can also write out of proportion. Maybe one woman was too busty for her form-fitting dress, while another had little or no shape to her booty or legs. Maybe our stories start out strong and fizzle to no meaning at all. Perhaps our essays are overpowered by too many details so readers get lost in the tangle and wonder which ones are significant. Perhaps our writing carries too few details that leave the reader confused or wondering what’s what. Maybe our essays offer enough “leg” to carry the story line or plot, but without sufficient heart or emotion.

Just Right 

Then there’s the woman with the form-fitting dress that carries it off to perfection. Her makeup is understated, while only the flare of her cheeks and lipstick match the depth of the magenta color of her dress. Just off-the-shoulder neckline reveals the shape of her bustline, but no cleavage.

The tautness of the dress reveals the lovely shape of her hips, but never distracts one by the line in the crack of her booty, like some of the others I saw that night. Instead, it draped to the ground, loose enough for her to walk gracefully. The dress left room for the imagination.

Just like our writing. The wow of style applied in this extended metaphor to our writing offers guidance without a set of how-tos or step-by-step instructions.

The writer must flaunt the form, the function, and color of the writing with flare. Reveal the stunning details, the flow of events, the emotions and reflections on the events, so the reader has enough to keep her or him riveted and enough room to imagine and reflect on its meaning. Balanced.

 

This metaphor of women’s attire to our writing, nevertheless, advises the writer … 

  1. to find balance in the details of people, places, and events;
  2. to express emotions and reflection to enhance meaning; and
  3. to expand a metaphor to allow the imagination of the reader to explore and discover.

EXAMPLE #1-Not so good.

The  palm trees grew out of dirt with no sustaining grass to hold them in place. The city of Phoenix the surrounding mountains in the distance were khaki-colored, not lush green. The moon was covered by a palm fromPhoenix, AZ April 2025 where I stood. 

I was from another part of the country and Phoenix disappointed me without green grass and blooming flowers in mid-April. The wedding of my nephew to his finance seemed like the surrounding environment should be fresh, green, lush, and blossoming.

The clouds, flanked by an archway, made a phoenix shape in the sky. That’s the metaphor I wanted for the couple.  Rebirth, becoming something new. Resilience, the ability to overcome. Transformation, the openness to becoming someone different as a couple, as parents, as a family unit.

NOTE: No strong sense of place, peope, or events. Little reflection. And the metaphor is too obvious. Uninteresting. 

EXAMPLE #2-Much better

My nephew Dean, the groom, and the likeable and genuinely spirited young woman, Carson, would rise toPhoenix, AZ April 2025
promise their love and devotion to each other for a lifetime tomorrow.

The Phoenix palm trees rose tall and regal but seemed lonely in the bare dirt floor that stretched over the city and into the surrounding mountains. A palm shielded the full moon from where I stood. Dry, barren desert did not represent what the couple meant to me.

As I sat and visited with my brother Bruce, father of the groom, I noticed a cloud in the shape of a Phoenix, over his shoulder. It stretched out in a forward, mounting motion, as if reaching for the next adventure. The archway behind my sibling framed the cloud for the photo I took.

The new couple would soar too, like the Phoenix. They would experience a rebirth and new beginning from two individuals to a single couple into a family unit; resilience, the strength to overcome adversity together and grow stronger; and the hope of shining brighter together than ever before and the years soar by. Rising!

NOTE: Here you have the metaphor without calling it that. It’s more organic. There are more details and people’s names making it personal. This story is more compressed leaving only the necessary details. And in this short essay you move with the writer though the experience and land on the reflection that the couple will soar and rise, much like the Phoenix. 

When we pay attention to add these 3 elements to our writing we take it to the next level.  Share a piece of writing with us to show how you used these elements to allow your writing to soar! 

___________________________________________

 

Posted in adventure, Awe, Metaphors, Mindfulness, paying attention

When Awe Walks In, Anxiety Walks Out

MY EXPERIENCE OF AWE

Scrolling

I didn’t plan for it. Just out for a walk, pacing the same loop with Murphy, my dog. Usually, I take my phone and scroll the morning news. With my head down I thumb through what’s happened in the world since I went to bed.

Multi-tasking

Besides the news, my mind travels in more than one direction, all the while, considering what’s on my calendar and what I can do with the time left. I carry my worries, my what-ifs—until something makes me stop.

In an instant, it may be silent, loud, or dramatic.

4 Examples of Awe

  1. One, a chameleon darts from brownish gravel up the stalk of a green plant, changing colors as it moves into new territory. Flexibility and openness are critical as we find ourselves in new surroundings. The chameleon changes its’ colors, not its essence. We don’t change the creatures we are.
  2. A different day, a bossy goose chases another one for who knows what reason. It’s wings widen in defiance of the other one, which reminds me we can let others into our circle of friends, even if we’re not comfortable at first. We might learn something or make a new friend.
  3. On another day, the wind shifts, a storm is on the way. I check the clouds and see an figure, whether a phoenix, a dog lopping, or a sword surfing across the sky. My imagination creates what the clouds provide. And intentionally, we too can assert and use our own creativity for the enjoyment of others.
  4. And still again, the squawk of a Blue Jay calls to one another in flight. My first thought is that it reminds me I will have a productive writing day. A second thought comes: or does it challenge me to write productively that day. What’s the metaphor for me?

The Result of a Moment of Awe

Regardless of the moment, it draws my attention from the anxieties of our times that are speaking to me on my phone. In that moment when awe marches into my world, anxiety slinks out.

RESEARCH SUPPORTS MY EXPERIENCE

In recent years, research sheds light on the topic of awe. Dacher Keltner in his book, AWE: The New Science of Everyday Wonder and How It Can Transform Your Life (2023), tells us that the human mind treats social threats as an invading pathogen. Things like chronic stress, loneliness, and/or being the target of prejudice can elevate inflammation or cytokine levels in our bodies.

On the other hand, awe offers a larger context for our lives, gives us metaphors to reconsider how we view our lives, and heightens our sense of being  loved and supported by a connected community.

Researchers theorized that everyday awe could lower our bodies’ inflammation. They gathered physical measures of inflammation against people’s experience of positive emotions, like pride, amusement, awe, and others.

The Result

Basically, of all the positive emotions studied, the only predictor to lower inflammation was awe.

“Awe occurs in a realm separate from the mundane world of materialism, money, acquisition, and status signaling—a realm beyond the profane that many call the sacred.” (Keltner, p. 19)

Whether we look for awe or get captured by it, it can transform our day, our outlook, and our physiology. And regardless if we are travelers, writers, or armchair readers, we can use a dose of awe that comes from paying attention to the life around us.

How About YOU

Also referenced in Keltner’s book is another research project of daily diary writing, in which researchers learned most study participants encountered awe 2-3 times a week. That’s about every other day. Why not several times a day? I must admit, I fall into the 2-3 times a week, as well.

When, where, and how do you experience awe in your life?